Monday, 18 August 2014

Monday Morning - Fresh week - Fresh Start.

Okay I have had a stinking cold all weekend - I had a really bad indegestion attack last night (these see me almost pass out and throw up) my bodies way of telling me to stop eating crap. But that was the weekend.

This Morning is bright new day, the rain has been and washed away all the cob webs.

This afternoon I start my new job, my nice relaxing just get on with it new job. Shift of 5pm - 9.15pm but going in at 3 for training up.

Today I want to get back on my healthy eating and exercise plan, to be as good as possible for the week towards holidays.

Short and sweet today x

Friday, 15 August 2014

Life's funny like that

Okay, so here's where we are at!
I half owned a shop, got poorly. Walked away from shop with business partners help. 
Reflected and decided I wanted to be a nurse/ a carer someone who made a difference and looked after people. So I looked into College / Uni and got a job as a care assistant! 

I started Eating Healthy, Exercising and Running, I was BETTER!!!!!

SCREEECCHHH!!!! Hit the brakes! BANG!!!!

Oh how foolish, its all gone Pete Tong! (WRONG).

College was going to be full time - work would not be possible around it, (Financially not viable), 
So Okay, plan B work hard at the home obtain NVQ's everything will be fine

 Go to work happy happy, oh dear have a shift from hell  3 other staff members were not acting appropriate in front of residents, 
(younger staff letting laughter and language get out of control, making me take sharp intake of  breaths, then realising I was the only one in the dining room with 20 out of 22 residents, they slightly forgot they were there to work, residents noticed and started to comment and complain.) 
Don't get me wrong this home offers first class care, but this shift was totally out of the norm and needed nipping in the bud. So Next morning I reported my concerns to deputy, BIG MISTAKE one of them, a new member of staff took umbrage and has made it a mission to have a go at me at every opportunity( This young girl is very confident granted - but when does confidence turn to arrogance). Despite other staff and management agreeing with me and my position on the shift,   this sees my confidence and fragile shell shattered, discussions with family and friends ensued and  so healthy eating, exercise and running started to slip. So I decided to leave, the home did try to get me to change my mind, praising my care qualities, which was lovely.

Roll forward to today, and as I sit and type this it is the morning after my last ever shift. I am taking time out again. Time to just enjoy life, work a little, play a lot. I am lucky and have very supportive friends and family, one of which has given me a little part time job working 4 hour shifts, so I don't sit and fret LOL! The good thing is she knows my life style and I can now run again every Thursday night yay! 

I am away on Holiday with my Youngest daughter soon so on reflection I am going to eat with weight watching in mind but not totally on track until after the holiday. Enjoy running as often as I can until after too.

Then when I am home It will be operation Be Fitter ME!!

Oh and the caring, making a difference and looking after people mantra - don't worry its still within me - but I have finally realised it has to be to myself first.

Feeling optimistic, Okay I have lost round two of the battle, but I have not lost this war.

Sunday, 27 July 2014

Sunday Morning,

Well I am sat in my PJ's thinking about getting dressed. 

Today I don't have work till 4.30pm - 8.30pm short shift that frustrates the hell out of me LOL! Wait all day to go in and then run around like a loon for 4 hours then home again. Its the waiting game that gets to me. I am finding I am very fidgety and need to be moving.

So what's the plan today.

Well I hope to be a good weight watcher today, although hubby still loves his roasts on a Sunday so roast beef tonight. Fruit and salad are the order for the rest of the day.

This morning I have decided I may pop into the shop to get back some of my craft goods from when I moved house. It has to be done, but to be honest it fills me with dread, A) as I don't want to craft at all and the sight  of all my stuff depresses me and B) when I go near the shop I have a panic attack and have an overwhelming sense of failure. 
But it has to be done, and have little time to do it as I must return my keys to Karen.

Hopefully exercise will clear my mind xx